i'm stuff

October 21, 2020 — Brynn

I probably spent 5-6 hours today listening to Duster and Why?. Christ. They have me feeling a way.

Oh, and more about Pleroma and Gemini.

Alopecia is an album I carried with me during the year or so before I started university, and although I have some more significant critique of it now, it still affects me when I hear it, moreso than Oaklandazulasylum (which I first heard more recently) and Elephant Eyelash/Sanddollars (which I heard first). I love them all dearly, though, along with most of Yoni Wolf's other work. I've heard plenty of indie pop, but I can't say I've encountered anyone that blends it with abstract hip-hop so masterfully (or at all).

do your pets prefer electric light?

do they lay awake at night,

contemplating Thomas Edison

or listening to AM radio?

I think the first thing of his I heard was Hymie's Basement, oddly enough. That's with the exception of the Boards of Canada remix of "Good Friday," which I heard when I was like 15.

Texas has nothing to do

with you,

but tonight I could accusingly

connect you to the Lone Star State

in five easy steps

Also listened to Duster's self-titled today, marking the second time I've heard it. I've heard Stratosphere, Contemporary Movement and their EPs how many times, now? And only played Duster once. No clue why I put it off almost a year, because I really enjoyed it.

Hearing Duster makes me really want to blaze it, but I don't know anyone who can help with that, and I'm also perfectly broke. I'd also be down for lorazepam, probably.

Named the hostname of my Raspberry Pi after a track from Contemporary Movement, the same track their official domain name comes from (though I didn't find that out until today).

wave clouds

I feel like I've been experiencing the same few emotions on repeat the last few months. Better than the way things were for a while, but not the ideal. I'm so tired.

Had a "please be patient i have autism"-esque moment with someone on irc last night. She apologized, but looking at the chatlog still kinda smarts. Don't care to get into it.

I met/started talking to someone else in the same irc, though, someone with similar mental health experiences (very much not identical but similar) and who's really comfy to talk to. She's really nice.

Got very sad at Pleroma. I was following the guide for OTR install up to the step where you generate environment files or something (the step after you generate the config file), and it kept throwing some inscrutable single-line error, something about an RPC call failing and a node being down. I'm told it was probably a unit test that failed, but I don't know what a unit test is, and googling the exact error string gave me absolutely no hints. Like, none, no info, nobody who ran into the same problem, nothing at all. Ended up apt purge-ing all the deps and getting rid of everything. Still sad about it, 'cause I miss the fediverse, and don't really know anyone runnning an instance that doesn't cost money to buy into a co-op or something.

Installed a Gemini browser on my laptop (Lagrange, it's graphical and really pretty). Having fun browsing, uh... well, they're not websites, and they're not gopherholes, but I still don't know what they're called! Very annoyed that no Gemini servers come in package form yet, and for that matter, that the Gemini community seems to be a distilled 96% concentration of developer types with no, uh, actual humans. It's just weird.

I'm most annoyed at the servers thing, though. There are 20 servers listed on the github list of software someone maintains, but it's utterly unclear which ones people actually use. It feels really inscrutable.

I don't know that I'll be able to be fucked with getting into Gemini, but if I don't, the time I spent setting up this RasPi will be wasted, because I have literally nothing else to do with it. So fingers crossed I find... something? anything? a prebuilt or user-friendly Gemini server, or failing that, something at all interesting to do with it?

I might just be being weird about it, but I feel weird about it too. What the fuck's going on?

Tags: personal, music